I’m a huge supporter of respecting yourself. Especially when it comes to how you dress. No, really.
But what is the modern lady to do? We read about how we should “stay classy”, how we should not be slutty, how we should take responsibility for our safety by what we wear, how we should be careful of what we make men think, how we should avoid certain items of clothing that are sure to degrade our bodies. And whatever we do, we must make sure to stay pretty but avoid attracting “too much” attention!
Please, try not to attract too much attention.
But either these warnings are vague, or full of contradictory suggestions. Often increasing in severity. Women should not wear leggings, pants, clothing not covered by a burka. Geez louise, who is right and who is wrong? Better find out before you accidentally disrespect yourself!
Oh, no! Anything but that! Give me the judgey guy who will monitor what I wear instead!
Fortunately, I recognized the need among womankind for a simple, easy-to-follow guide that will allow you to know for sure whether or not you are respecting yourself by what you wear. You’re welcome, ladies.
1. Examine your motives.
What are your reasons for choosing your outfit today? Are you comfortable with these reasons? Are you ignoring the voices of your judgey neighbor, your extra conservative uncle, that girl at work you barely know? Have you made a decision that works for you, and makes your feel confident and secure?
If you answer “yes” to all of these questions, then congratulations! You are respecting yourself instead of everyone else. Good job.
(Side note: asking for fashion advice is not necessarily discouraged. Sometimes a girl wants to get a friend or loved one’s opinion on an outfit for a special occasion, or just because. This is not the same as relying on another person to tell you whether or not you are a worthwhile person based on your clothing. And if you happen to disagree with the person giving the advice, carry on. No one will like every outfit you choose, and visa versa.)
2. Examine your feelings.
How do you feel? Are you happy? Comfortable? Confident? Do you feel attractive? Professional? Edgy? Or whatever other adjective you were going for? Does your outfit fulfill your motives that you examined in item one? Do you want to wear this outfit?
Do you wish you were wearing something else? Is someone else making you feel like you can’t wear what you want? Do you feel pressured in any way?
If you answered “yes” to all of the questions in the first paragraph and “no” to all of the questions in the second paragraph, then congratulations! You are respecting yourself by what you are wearing.
You look cute today. You know you do.
Now, go forth, you respectable woman, and conquer the day!
photo credit: Collin Key via photopin cc